Young Love: How do men get over a breakup?

Boys don't cry and other myths we're busting about men and relationships

By Nabeel Ahmed

KARACHI: Breaks-ups are tough. Getting over someone and moving on is even worse. There’s plenty out there on what to do and how to get over a break-up but most of it is for women and is unfortunately cliché, i.e, eating ice-cream, going on a girls night out, and so on.

But, how do men get over a breakup?

Unlike what most would think, men do feel sad and heartbroken after a break-up.

Let me clarify we’re not the heartless and cruel creatures that many women believe us to me. We’re as human as the rest of you.

The end of a relationship is quite terrible for all parties involved. And not having any reaction to a breakup (especially a messy and hurtful one) means there’s something wrong with you whatever your gender is.

Let’s bust some myths about guys and breakups, shall we?

1. Myth: Men get over a relationship in a second

Reality: You’re going about your daily life, chilling with your boys, and then bam, it hits you: you didn’t get a message from her. And you miss that.

2. Myth: Men believe the easiest way to get over a breakup is partying 24/7

Reality: We avoid family and friends or just generally anyone who knew about the relationship and its result. And, in some cases, those who didn’t. People give you unwanted attention, and pry about why we’re down or why our mood is off. Going out might work for some people, but not everyone.

3. Myth: Men don’t cry

Reality: You’re all gonna like this one: we do cry. We cry when no one’s watching and it actually helps us. We hurt and we suffer when it doesn’t work out with someone. And so at the end of a long day of college or work, when we’re finally alone, we do curl up and cry.

4. Myth: Men don’t discuss their feelings with friends

Reality: We do happen to seek advice from close friends.

5. Myth: Men look for a quick rebound

Reality: Someone genuinely invested in a relationship does not look for a rebound. Movies tend to glamourise insensitivity of men with dialogues like “Larki, bus, train, ek jaati hay doosri aati hai“. But that’s not how most men really feel.

6. Myth: Time heals everything

Reality: Time does heal everything

I’d like to leave this at a hopeful note. Even Sid from Dil Chahta Hai found someone. So yeah … everyone gets the love they deserve.

This story is part of a series, Young Love, which is updated weekly. Read the previous entry here

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