The aliens are coming … for Nawaz Sharif

We've narrowed down a list of suspects


KARACHI: Since elections are just around the corner, politicians are having a go at each other in the final days (not like they ever stop doing that even when the threat of elections isn’t looming over their heads.) Amid all the chaos that currently surrounds Pakistan’s political landscape, Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz (PML-N) chief Nawaz Sharif has further scared Pakistanis with an imminent threat: “We are at war with the aliens,” he said at a PML-N rally earlier this week.

Judging by all those Hollywood films, we always thought that the war between humans and aliens would start from the United States first and then consume the rest of the world. Regardless, it’s imperative that we identify these aliens and what they might look like and Cutacut has some suggestions:

1. Jadoo

Our first guess is that it’s somebody like Jadoo. He’s very likely working as an Indian spy, since he first came to Earth through India, and we all know that our common enemy, after these aliens, are the Indians. So alien + Indian = Jadoo.

2. Clark Kent

We all remember him as our beloved superhero but let’s not forget that Clark Kent, AKA Superman, is actually an alien. Before assuming a human name, Superman was known as Kal-El on his home planet Krypton. There’s a reason why Bruce Wayne has always been a little suspicious of him. HE COULD BE THE ALIEN THREATENING NAWAZ SHARIF!

3. Yoda

Jedi Grand Master Yoda is one of the oldest, and most powerful known Jedi Masters in the Star Wars universe. Don’t be fooled by his size though.

4. PK

Don’t act like you weren’t suspicious of his goody-two-shoes behaviour as well. We now know what his real mission might have been. Also, there’s the Indian connection so our vote is on him.